Find Ways to Say “Yes”: How Accepting Influence Can Transform Your Relationship and Your Life

Let’s get honest for a moment—most of us say we’re good at compromise, at hearing our partner out, at being a “team.” But when life gets real and emotions rise, how often do we really pause, breathe, and lean into each other’s wisdom?

I’ve seen time and time again that relationships—whether romantic, platonic, or even professional—thrive when both people feel heard, not just tolerated. It’s not about giving in. It’s about creating space. It’s about accepting influence.

So what does it mean to accept influence?

Accepting influence isn’t saying “yes, dear” to avoid conflict. It’s not silence, or agreeing just to keep the peace. And it certainly isn’t weakness.

Accepting influence is an act of respect and emotional intelligence. It says:

“I value your thoughts, even when I don’t agree.”
“Your perspective matters to me.”
“I’m open to seeing things differently, and I trust that there’s more than one right answer.”

When we make room for someone else’s truth—even when it challenges ours—we stretch. We grow. We get stronger, together.

Why is this so hard sometimes?

For some of us, it’s about control. Maybe we grew up needing to protect ourselves. Maybe we had to fight to be heard, and now we’re not letting go of the mic easily.

For others, it’s the opposite. We were taught not to take up space. Taught to go along, stay quiet, let others lead.

But sis, let me tell you something: you were born to influence, and to be influenced. Love doesn’t work when it’s one-way. Power struggles don’t build peace. And “my way or the highway” always leads to a dead end.

Ask yourself:

• Do I actually listen when someone I care about is talking?

• Am I open to changing my mind, or just waiting for my turn to speak?

• Do I allow myself to be soft, even when I’m scared?

Try this instead:

1. Pause before you respond.
When your partner, friend, or child says something that challenges you, try not to react. Take a breath. Say, “Tell me more.”

2. Be curious, not combative.
You don’t have to agree. But can you understand? Can you reflect back what you heard and say, “I see where you’re coming from”?

3. Say yes when you can.
Sometimes “yes” isn’t a full agreement—it’s just an acknowledgment. “I see your point” or “That’s a good idea” are small ways to build mutual trust.

4. Let go of being right.
Being right is overrated. Being connected? That’s everything.

Let’s bring this home with a little self-check:

Here’s a mini “Heart Quiz” just for you. Answer yes or no—no judgment, just truth.

• Do I listen to understand, or just to respond?

• Do I ask for advice and then ignore it?

• Can I honor someone’s truth without needing to change it?

• Have I ever said, “I hadn’t thought of it that way before. Thank you”?

• Do the people I love feel safe being honest with me?

If you said “no” to any of these, you’re not alone. You’re growing. That’s the work.

This is the kind of conversation we have in the Her She Squad.

We grow together by getting honest with ourselves. We hold space for each other’s voices. We practice love—not the picture-perfect, filtered kind, but the real kind that requires listening, unlearning, and evolving.

If this resonated with you, come join us.
Her She Squad isn’t just a community. It’s a movement. It’s a mirror. And it’s a reminder that your voice and your relationships are worth the effort.

Let’s stop building walls and start building bridges.

Let’s say “yes” more.

#FeliciaRayOwens #TheFeliciaFiles #FROUSA #LocalVoices #IndependentMedia #HerSheSquad